Looking After Yourself During a Separation

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Going through a separation is something no one ever plans for. Due to the random and abrupt characteristics of separation, our bodies tend to be emotionally drained and this can lead to unwanted conditions such as stress and depression. It is important to realise that as the relationship stops, the whole world revolving around it keeps spinning, and this is the reason why it is important to look after yourself during and after a separation. The following are some things you can do to ensure take care of your well-being during these trying times.

Talk To Someone

There is always someone willing to lend an ear when you are dealing with separation. It may be a work colleague at work, a friend, a religious elder or even free counsellors that are available online. Pick one of these that you feel most comfortable with, and you will realise a problem shared is a problem half solved. Just be careful not to make this talking banter about your ex-partner or gossip.

Make Sure You Make Time For Your Hobbies

Distracting the mind by doing other things we enjoy is a good way to keep healthy during and after separation. This can be simple things like taking walks and more complex activities like doing Yoga. Your mind plays a huge part when you feel stressed as it does all the flashbacks and thinking, therefore, by doing other things, you take away from it the chance to stress you.

Avoid/Limit the consumption of Alcohol

If you cannot stop completely, it is highly advised that you keep alcohol to a bare minimum. This is because the process of ‘drowning your sorrows’ in a glass of wine, can easily lead to dependence which leads to addiction. The latter can lead to more complex troubles, therefore, staying away from sources of temptation to consume alcohol is highly recommended.

Pay extra attention to the basics

A healthy well-being can be achieved by making sure the basic things such as eating well, drinking water, exercising and getting enough sleep are kept in check. Because your emotions are vulnerable during such a time, it is important for you to focus more on ensuring you prepare a healthy meal, as this, in turn, will lead to a healthy mind, keeping stress at bay.

Consider Others affected by the separation

Many a time there are others affected by the separation. These can be children you had with your partner or your extended family. It is best to talk to children nicely, explaining the circumstances (you don’t have to go into detail). It is best to avoid pointing fingers at your ex-partner. Your extended family may also have concerns about your well-being during and after separation. If possible, spend as much time as you can with them. Doing this will not only reassure them, but it will also clear your mind and prepare you for moving on.


If you are able to take care of yourself, this stage of agony or disappointment will pass and you will be able to move on. As Alexander Graham Bell put it, “When one door closes, another opens, but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” Our family lawyers at Cairns Divorce Lawyers can recommend professionals you can work with during this time. 

At Cairns Divorce Lawyers you will always speak to a Lawyer